Smile...tomorrow will be worse!

Have you ever looked for something in one pocket and found it in the other? Ever had a set of two similar looking keys and always started with the wrong one? Whatever was Blaise Pascal thinking when he said that the probability of two mutually independent events occurring was 0.5? Ask Capt. Murphy, and he'll tell you that if one of those events is "something wrong", its probability jumps to 1.

No matter how you try to disguise it as the Second Law of Thermodynamics or Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle; no matter how philosophically you smirk when you euphemise, "The only constant is change"; there is just no escaping it. It has been stated in a variety of versions, using such sophistic techniques as tautology (If anything can go wrong, it can), syllogism (Everything in life is important, important things are simple, simple things are never easy), recursion (It always takes longer than you think, even taking into account this law) and Mathematics (Laundry Math:1 Washer + 1 Dryer + 2 Socks = 1 Sock). Its applications transcend all domains of expertise, ranging from Technology (To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer), Commerce (A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the pants), Photography (If you can't remember, you left the film at home), Transportation (The largest vehicle always has the right of way), Parenting (Murphy's mother told him so) and even Graphic Design (Your fonts will default).

There's only one piece of advice I can offer...don't stress yourself out. There's no way you can out-think nature, for if n things are prevented, the (n+1)th thing will screw it. I think this statement sums it up best of all:

If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.

PS: If you can, go through the e-mail exchange in the "Real-Life Example" section on the site.

"What have you learned?"

We were sitting in the living room, strangers to each other months, days, even hours ago. It was late, almost 1 a.m. and the children had gone to bed. Some of us lay spread-eagled on the floor, others in armchairs with their legs up, still others leaning on whatever was near and back-worthy. One in particular, whom I had persuaded to stay, half-sat half-lay on the couch, nodding in sleep and looking beatiful.

Someone asked a question.

"I don't really ever think of it as learning", replied one, whose last job forced him to work 12-hour days starting at 3 am. "But I guess I learned that with two kids, you can never really keep track of time. I hardly talk to my wife...and then there's the thoughts I don't talk about anyways. But one day I'm screaming at my 5-yr old daughter, and my 2-yr old son walks up and hugs me. I look at him thinking 'What are you doing? I'm screaming at your sister!' He smiles his shy smile. Man, that's unconditional love right there."

"I'm learning about powerlessness," said another, whose 1-yr old daughter had had surgery when she was a month-old and has learned sign-language and is the most active child I've ever seen. "I know I'm doing what I love to do as a teacher, and it's challenging when people who know nothing about it take charge of it; but I'm learning about the faith and strength to keep doing what I do."

"Sustainability," said a third, who had ridden a Greyhound for 7 hours to get here. "I've sold my car, drive my bicycle around, use public transport, and I'm loving it. I'm living with people with similar interests, and it's great to see that we're trying to make a difference by living out our ideal."

My turn. "I'm re-learning simple things", I said, "It's frightfully easy to go back to where you were even after learning and changing. The other day as I was waiting for my bus, the sun was shining and it was snowing at the same time. It was beautiful, but people all around were just bustling about their daily lives, not stopping to look, to taste the snow on their tongues...I re-learnt that it's a privilege to be able to see beauty, in whatever small way, every day."

"I've learned that I'm exactly where I want to be," said the person next to me, a single mother to a 13-yr old dog. "It was a big decision to quit and work from home, and it was really shaky for a while, but I figured it out and now it's fairly smooth. But," she turned to me. "I miss what you talked about."

It's easy for me to say, I thought, I'm a college student who doesn't have to work the whole day, and doesn't (for now) have a career to worry about. But is it that hard to miss? When a rainbow sears across the sky, how can you not see it? When the setting sun kindles the clouds ablaze, would you rather talk on your cell-phone? How far do you have to go to hear a bird chirping or a child laughing? What does it take to turn off the TV and find a moment of silence?

Or to sit with a group of friends, coming together from different parts of the country, even from around the world, and find the comfort to share the thoughts in your heart?

Or the freedom to fall asleep?

Hot stuff

I'm talking about portabella mushroom ravioli.
We were cooking some of that delectable spaghetti yesterday, and I was reading out the cooking directions loud.
"...Cook to minimum internal ravioli temperature of 165F...."
Man, I thought. That sounds impressive. Perhaps we should all change our temperature scale to Minimum Internal Ravioli Temperature (MIRT). I mean, when we can represent the same physical phenomenon (boiling point of water) with two entirely different numbers (100C and 212F), then why not in MIRT? I'll say water boils at 47MIRT. My body temperature is -66.3 MIRT. Wow! That's cool. I almost know what Kelvin felt like when he discovered absolute zero!
Wonder what the weather's supposed to be like...? What's that? -135MIRT? God, that's freezing!

Tathaastu

And then, O king, the earth, oppressed with weight and afflicted with fear, sought the protection of the Grandsire of all creatures. And she beheld the divine Brahman--the Creator of the worlds who knoweth no deterioration--surrounded by the gods, Brahmanas, and great Rishis, of exceeding good fortune, and adored by delighted Gandharvas and Apsaras always engaged in the service of the celestials. And the Earth, desirous of protection, then represented everything to him, in the presence, O Bharata, of all the Regents of the worlds. But, O king, the Earth's object had been known beforehand to the Omniscient, Self-create, and Supreme Lord. And, O Bharata, Creator as he is of the universe, why should he not know fully what is in the minds of his creatures including the very gods and the Asuras? O king, the Lord of the Earth, the Creator of all creatures, also called Isa, Sambhu, Prajapati, then spake unto her. And Brahman said, 'O holder of wealth, for the accomplishment of the object for which thou hast approached me, I shall appoint all the dwellers in the heavens.'

"Vaisampayana continued, 'Having said so unto the Earth, O king, the divine Brahman bade her farewell. And the Creator then commanded all the gods saying, 'To ease the Earth of her burden, go ye and have your births in her according to your respective parts and seek ye strife (with the Asuras already born there)'. And the Creator of all, summoning also all the tribes of the Gandharvas and the Apsaras, spake unto them these words of deep import, 'Go ye and be born amongst men according to your respective parts in forms that ye like.'

"And all the gods with Indra, on hearing these words of the Lord of the celestials--words that were true, desirable under the circumstances, and fraught with benefit,--accepted them. And they all having resolved to come down on earth in their respected parts, then went to Narayana, the slayer of all foes, at Vaikunth--the one who has the discus and the mace in his hands, who is clad in purple, who is of great splendour, who hath the lotus on his navel, who is the slayer of the foes of the gods, who is of eyes looking down upon his wide chest (in yoga attitude), who is the lord of the Prajapati himself, the sovereign of all the gods, of mighty strength, who hath the mark of the auspicious whirl on his breast, who is the mover of every one's faculties and who is adored by all the gods.
Him, Indra the most exalted of persons, addressed, saying, "Be
incarnate." And Hari replied,--'Let it be.'"

The Mahabharata of Krishna-Dwaipayana Vyasa - BOOK 1 - ADI PARVA
Translated into English Prose from the Original Sanskrit Text by Kisari Mohan Ganguli
[1883-1896]

Touchy subject

They say that the first thing a man sees when he looks at a woman is her hair. And the next thing is the waist-to-hip ratio. Which says that it doesn't really matter how big Barbie's bustline (or how thin the rest of her) gets.
And I can't even imagine what a woman looks at first when she sees a man. But I suspect it's a lot different from what most people (at least guys) think it is.
So here's to all you 'lookers' out there - get over it. The more you try and impress with your looks the more distant someone is from your mind. Of course i'm not asking you to look like a loser.
Not unless you feel like one.